So after a tumultuous two 1/2 years of living in Maryland, I find myself in a new relationship with a man, who, til this day has shown me the meaning of "relationships are work".
I'm living in the city, enjoying life and I meet this New Yorker who I'm fond of and our personalities clicked off break. We're both music lovers, both like a good party, great conversation, educated, and love to eat and drink...well, I eat more than him, my greedy ass. I was excited because for the first time since 1997 I had a for real boyfriend. Not someone I had to share with another female. Not someone who I had to keep on the low or vice versa. Not someone who was lying about how many women was in his life. I had real boyfriend that was mine and I was his and we were inseparable.I'm talking he would go to work with me during some of my part time jobs. He's gonna kill me for saying that, but it was so cute, tho!
So you know when you're in love, all the problems of the world are so irrelevant to your life:
Oh there is a war in the middle east? Oh, it's okay, my baby shows me peace and love everyday.
Oh, there is homelessness in the streets?? it's okay, my baby feeds and keeps me warm, though.
Oh, it's the end of the world, the rapture is happening?? oh it's okay, my baby will shelter me and we will die hand in hand.
C'mon son, get the hell outta here with that mess.
Hey Diddy, Muah, love you boo!
But yep, that was me, SPRUNG! He was sprung too, dammit!!!
So, of course NOW, I'm loving life, loving love and who better to celebrate love with than my sister-cousin-auntie-best friend, Mary J!!! Now, The Breakthrough Album was my ish!! MJB the MVP!!! YASSSS!!! But the joint she did with Raphael Saadiq, So Lady...it was my hearts anthem at the time
I...I never thought I could feel so much like a lady
It's good to have doors open for me
By a real man, who wants to hold my hand
And he's not ashamed to be out in public with me
It's the simple things that really turn me on
Like being kind, being warm to me that makes a man look strong
And that's why I don't mind spending all my time with him
I feel so ummm ummm
I feel so lady (I feel so lady)
When I'm with you when I'm round you
I feel so lady (I feel so lady)
When I'm with you when I'm round you
When I'm with you when I'm round you
The first of many flowers he bought me, before he learned tulips are my favorite, he started with roses.
As far as I was concerned, I was broken from the "side chick" shackles that I had put myself in repeatedly. Hell, my theme song to the past men who had side chick'd me was, "Enough Crying"! This should be every former side chick's anthem as far as I'm concerned.
Cause um
The sex was good
You had my mind
And I let you
Come back Every time
You would Violate
And cross The line
And you Knew that I
Would be The type
To always Wait so patiently
Thinkin' You was comin'
Home to me Well
Damn, I never heard The keys
Or Felt ya taps
Sayin' are You sleep
I had enough crying, because now, I was experiencing what REAL LOVE felt like. No more holidays alone, no more coming second to "wifey", no more having to wonder what he was doing with her when he wasn't with you. No more seeing pictures of them together on Social Media and acting like you're fine with it. I HAD ENOUGH and now I was someones QUEEN!!!!
I love me some him!!!!!!
OMG, I was on cloud nine with this boy and even when we fussed and argued and go two or three god-awful days not talking to each other, we still persevered through whatever pettiness we were going through. And sure enough, the days we weren't talking, I was belting out the words to "Be Without You:
See this is real talk
I’m always stay (no matter what)
Good or bad (thick and thin)
Right or wrong (all day everyday)
Now if you’re down on love or don’t believe
This ain’t for you (no, this ain’t for you)
And if you got it deep in your heart
And deep down you know that it’s true (come on, come on, come on)
Well, let me see you put your hands up (hands up)
Fellas tell your lady she’s the one (fellas tell your lady she’s the one, oh)
Put your hands up (hands up)
Ladies let him know he's got your love
Look him right in his eyes and tell him
We’ve been...
Too strong for too long (and I can’t be without you baby)
And I’ll be waiting up until you get home (cuz I can’t sleep without you baby)
Anybody who’s ever loved, ya know just what I feel
Too hard to fake it, nothing can replace it
Call the radio if you just can’t be without your baby
I don't know about most of you, but my experience in love has not been the best and certainly not story book. Therefore, to find someone I was compatible with, we had fun, he genuinely loved me and ONLY me, it made my heart and soul feel something that it had not felt in a very long time. I can admit, I'm not the easiest to deal with. I'm spoiled, sassy, have a smart ass mouth, demanding and want to be in control ALL THE TIME, but God must have installed a certain patience, forgiveness and love inside this man to deal with me and it felt like heaven. Not only that, he has the backbone to check my ass when I need it! lol This was the REAL Breakthrough that I was yearning for, praying for and after all this time, I had finally received it. I no longer had to hold on to the heart wrenching pain of the "My Life" album, I had catapulted in my love, my maturity and certainly womanhood to embrace not only the growth of myself, but for the first time, I realized the growth of Mary.
While I was muddling through heartaches, and holding on to the old, sorrowful, scorned Mary of the My Life Album, in reality, Mary was flourishing, she had got married in 2003, but I was so tunnel vision in my own crap, I didn't celebrate in her new life and her growth.
Although it was the beginning of 2006, I was catching up with Mary now. For the first time I now feel what I imagine Mary has been feeling--happiness and freedom that love brings. Good, bad or indifferent, I was elated and in love.
Look at Auntie Mary and Uncle Kendu ^^^^ Aren't they silly!!!
E and I were silly as well...it's the joys of love
However, just like anyone, I was still experiencing the growing pains of life and of love, and sure enough, so was Mary!
NEXT: Growing Pains
I'm living in the city, enjoying life and I meet this New Yorker who I'm fond of and our personalities clicked off break. We're both music lovers, both like a good party, great conversation, educated, and love to eat and drink...well, I eat more than him, my greedy ass. I was excited because for the first time since 1997 I had a for real boyfriend. Not someone I had to share with another female. Not someone who I had to keep on the low or vice versa. Not someone who was lying about how many women was in his life. I had real boyfriend that was mine and I was his and we were inseparable.
So you know when you're in love, all the problems of the world are so irrelevant to your life:
Oh there is a war in the middle east? Oh, it's okay, my baby shows me peace and love everyday.
Oh, there is homelessness in the streets?? it's okay, my baby feeds and keeps me warm, though.
Oh, it's the end of the world, the rapture is happening?? oh it's okay, my baby will shelter me and we will die hand in hand.
C'mon son, get the hell outta here with that mess.
But yep, that was me, SPRUNG! He was sprung too, dammit!!!
So, of course NOW, I'm loving life, loving love and who better to celebrate love with than my sister-cousin-auntie-best friend, Mary J!!! Now, The Breakthrough Album was my ish!! MJB the MVP!!! YASSSS!!! But the joint she did with Raphael Saadiq, So Lady...it was my hearts anthem at the time
I...I never thought I could feel so much like a lady
It's good to have doors open for me
By a real man, who wants to hold my hand
And he's not ashamed to be out in public with me
It's the simple things that really turn me on
Like being kind, being warm to me that makes a man look strong
And that's why I don't mind spending all my time with him
I feel so ummm ummm
I feel so lady (I feel so lady)
When I'm with you when I'm round you
I feel so lady (I feel so lady)
When I'm with you when I'm round you
When I'm with you when I'm round you
As far as I was concerned, I was broken from the "side chick" shackles that I had put myself in repeatedly. Hell, my theme song to the past men who had side chick'd me was, "Enough Crying"! This should be every former side chick's anthem as far as I'm concerned.
Cause um
The sex was good
You had my mind
And I let you
Come back Every time
You would Violate
And cross The line
And you Knew that I
Would be The type
To always Wait so patiently
Thinkin' You was comin'
Home to me Well
Damn, I never heard The keys
Or Felt ya taps
Sayin' are You sleep
I had enough crying, because now, I was experiencing what REAL LOVE felt like. No more holidays alone, no more coming second to "wifey", no more having to wonder what he was doing with her when he wasn't with you. No more seeing pictures of them together on Social Media and acting like you're fine with it. I HAD ENOUGH and now I was someones QUEEN!!!!
OMG, I was on cloud nine with this boy and even when we fussed and argued and go two or three god-awful days not talking to each other, we still persevered through whatever pettiness we were going through. And sure enough, the days we weren't talking, I was belting out the words to "Be Without You:
See this is real talk
I’m always stay (no matter what)
Good or bad (thick and thin)
Right or wrong (all day everyday)
Now if you’re down on love or don’t believe
This ain’t for you (no, this ain’t for you)
And if you got it deep in your heart
And deep down you know that it’s true (come on, come on, come on)
Well, let me see you put your hands up (hands up)
Fellas tell your lady she’s the one (fellas tell your lady she’s the one, oh)
Put your hands up (hands up)
Ladies let him know he's got your love
Look him right in his eyes and tell him
We’ve been...
Too strong for too long (and I can’t be without you baby)
And I’ll be waiting up until you get home (cuz I can’t sleep without you baby)
Anybody who’s ever loved, ya know just what I feel
Too hard to fake it, nothing can replace it
Call the radio if you just can’t be without your baby
I don't know about most of you, but my experience in love has not been the best and certainly not story book. Therefore, to find someone I was compatible with, we had fun, he genuinely loved me and ONLY me, it made my heart and soul feel something that it had not felt in a very long time. I can admit, I'm not the easiest to deal with. I'm spoiled, sassy, have a smart ass mouth, demanding and want to be in control ALL THE TIME, but God must have installed a certain patience, forgiveness and love inside this man to deal with me and it felt like heaven. Not only that, he has the backbone to check my ass when I need it! lol This was the REAL Breakthrough that I was yearning for, praying for and after all this time, I had finally received it. I no longer had to hold on to the heart wrenching pain of the "My Life" album, I had catapulted in my love, my maturity and certainly womanhood to embrace not only the growth of myself, but for the first time, I realized the growth of Mary.
While I was muddling through heartaches, and holding on to the old, sorrowful, scorned Mary of the My Life Album, in reality, Mary was flourishing, she had got married in 2003, but I was so tunnel vision in my own crap, I didn't celebrate in her new life and her growth.
Although it was the beginning of 2006, I was catching up with Mary now. For the first time I now feel what I imagine Mary has been feeling--happiness and freedom that love brings. Good, bad or indifferent, I was elated and in love.
However, just like anyone, I was still experiencing the growing pains of life and of love, and sure enough, so was Mary!
NEXT: Growing Pains
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