Let's Set the Record Straight

 would you still love me if I dated him and I dressed like that?

A few months back I was dating a lawyer.  GASP, yes I was dating an attorney.  He was so cute, fun, very intelligent and nice.  However, our schedules did not connect.  Too bad for him, I'm the bomb.com

Anyways, while at dinner with friends, back in the spring, my girl, whom had not seen me in some years and after a few drinks said,

“Lisa, what are you doing with him, you date thugs.”

I wanted to kick her under the table.  Lawyer boy is looking at me, I’m looking at my soror and back at Lawyer boy and I say, “ohhhhh, that was then, this is now”. 

 Oh, what a cliché response, but I was on the spot, AND I did not want to get into the “past boyfriends” conversation with lawyer boy right there. 

Today, I was at work, and those of you who don’t know, I work at National Institutes of Health, so the man pool of eligible African American men is very slim.  I don’t know why, but brothas just aren’t into science unless it’s street science or the science of counting money and hoes. 

Anyways, I was at work and this young man (I’m guessing late twenties) has become what I call my “work boo”.  We’ll call him PhD Boy. 

Well PhD Boy and I occasionally see each other and have little chitchats.  Today was a breakthrough because he walked me to my car, asked my name, gave me a handshake and told me his name.   He was cute and funny in a college boy type of way.  

So, I tell my girl about him (not the same one who blew my spot up with Lawyer Boy) and she says,

“c’mon L, don’t play yourself you’re not about to date some young nerdy research boy at your job. “

 WHAT?

Yo, what the hell is going on?  What are you all seeing in me and the men I date, that I am clearly not seeing.  ON THE OTHER HAND is it that you all don’t know me very well? 

In that case, let me break it down for ya’ll:  I LOVE MEN!  I like em brown, yellow, Puerto Rican or Haitian,  My name is L Boogie from the Zulu Nation.  I mean what the hell???

I’ve dated white men, ugly men (yes I can admit some weren’t cute), short boys, drug dealers, east coast men, west coast men, football players (non professional of course, college and high school, and they are my favorite), stuck up basketball players (also non professional), frat boys (I’m a Kappa type of girl), hustlers, even those metrosexual boys that if they were to pop up gay, I wouldn’t be surprised. 

Now, most of my friends know that I like a man with some “appeal” to him.  Yeah, I used to want a “thug appeal” T.I type dude or someone with an abundance of swag, but that ish can be overrated. 

Also, you have to keep in mind, you all love my bubbly personality, and for a female, I must admit, my swag is terrific, I have game—if I do say so myself.  Haha, who am I fooling, if I had game I would not be single.  Nevertheless, you all catch my drift, I’m witty, funny and "typically" you would not pair me with a Ph.D., student or a lawyer. 

However, my point is, I really will date who ever grabs my attention and is smart enough and strong enough to KEEP my attention...and handle my sassy mouth. 

Hey, Lance Gross or Mark Wahlberg, if either of you are reading, you already have my attention!  I would sooooooo become submissive for them!!!  Hop on one foot and make noises like an orangutang

At the end of the day, I like a man who is secure with who he is and who I am.  Funny like me, great personality, outgoing, smart and down to earth.  I don't have a God awful long list like some people do that will put you to sleep with all of my high standards, no, that list is in my bible, God knows what's up. 

Anyways,  there is a difference between just dating any ol body versus someone ideal for me.  Whoa, hold up now, you won’t catch me with a 60 year old man and we’re riding in his dirty old beat up Ford pick up truck looking like Denzel at the fight...

YA'LL BETTER LEAVE MY BABY ALONE!  DENZEL IS ONE OF MY FIRST LOVES, NOW SHIT, LEAVE EM ALONE BECAUSE HE WILL SHOW UP ON A GQ COVER AND SHUT IT DOWN!!!!

 But this shit is too hilarious....

As I was saying, don’t put it past me if I date a lawyer boy, or a PhD grad, I’m JUST SAYING!  Hell, most of ya’ll have seen my track record of men…. could be a reason why I’m single now…bunch of ninja’s!  (or I’m just a commitment phobic)

Coming to you live and direct from the temple of Malisea Queen where she has her eye opened to ALLLLLLL of the possibilities! Even Denzel at the fight....